Insanity in the Insane Ward
by Distant-fawkes-tears
Summary: Follow Gilderoy Lockhart on a journey throughout his day at St. Mungo's. The poor chap needs some company, how about his own reflection? A short story with mild humour. Well, considering he's nearly insane from that memory erase, who wouldn't be funny whe


Insanity in the Insane Ward  
  
Sunlight filtered through the window and through the lilac coloured curtains. A particular bright ray of light fell upon my desk and there you could see my memoirs, photographs, lots of my pretty pens and most certainly all of my mail! Oh how I could not live without my mail. It's the only thing keeping me going. Did you know that?  
  
My eyes shifted around my small room. How small it did look from inside the room. When peered into from the hall, it looked quite large. i can barely fit my bed, desk, that abomination of a rocking chair Dumbledore gave me, and my bureau/i, I thought miserably.  
  
I groaned and sat up to look at the clock on the wall. 9:45, it read. "Ugh, far to early to be getting up out of bed on a Tuesday. Honestly, why must they come shove medicine down my throat? I'm fine. I think."  
  
I got up and walked over to my bureau. iWhat to wear today/i, I thought happily. This is the best part of the day, picking out what to wear. Everything depends on what you wear. You present yourself to your audience and they must be impressed by your looks. If they aren't, they don't care about you, you're nothing to them if you don't look nice. Anxiety  
  
I opened the top drawer. i No...not the lacy robes today. /i I then proceeded to open the second drawer. i]Solids? Maybe... But what colour? Bright orange? No... bad taste. Oh, perhaps the dusty rust ones, /i" I thought. iYes, that is what I'll wear. /i I changed into the robes and picked up the corresponding hat.  
  
"See?" I muttered to Gilbert, my reflection as I looked into the full length mirror on the back off the door, "I look fabulous, not even a hag could say I didn't look wonderfulous."  
  
Suddenly the door opened, and SMACK! The door opened straight into my face.  
  
"MY FACE!" I felt warm liquid seep down my lip.  
  
"Oh God! Are you alright? I'm so sorry! I didn't see you standing there!" said Drayce , my nurse.  
  
"You've ruined my face! I can never go out in public again! How will my fans react? Oh dear..." I brought my hands to my face and felt the blood running from my nose.  
  
"Oh Gilderoy, it's not bad. Once you get that cleaned up no one is going to notice that a door hit you."  
  
"The door didn't hit me! I hit it! Nothing can hit the great and powerful Gilderoy Lockhart!" I said raising my hands to the heavens.  
  
"Yes. Of course. Silly me for forgetting. And forgive me for forgetting that you hit the door, not it hit you." Drayce said wetting a towel from inside my bathroom.  
  
"You are forgiven. Now, would you like an autograph?" I walked over to my desk and pulled out one of my peacock quills, an ink bottle, and one of my less beautiful pictures of myself.  
  
"Oh that's alright. I already have so many that you've given me over the past couple of years." She walked up to me and grabbed at my face.  
  
"Hey! What do you think you're doing?"  
  
"I need to clean that blood off your face. Unless you want to keep that new look." I shuddered.  
  
"No that's alright. Be gentle, my face is very sensitive to alien touch." Drayce grunted and started to wipe my face free of blood.  
  
"Thank you. Now, I have to get ready for my fans. I have a signing in a couple hours time."  
  
Drayce laughed and gathered her things. "Now Gilderoy, I want you to take that medication right in front of me. No throwing it down the toilet like last time."  
  
I groaned. Oh how I hated how that stuff tasted. "Fine," I whined. I grabbed at the cup she was handing me. I opened my mouth and gulped the fowl tasting concoction down. I smacked my lips. "Ah. Happy now?"  
  
"Very. Now, have a good day." Drayce bowed out of my room and shut the door.  
  
I stretched and walked over to my desk and sat down. I picked up one of my many letters on my desk. As I saw the name, my eyes watered.  
  
"My dear Katrina Fountane. Let's see what she wrote me this week."  
  
iMy dear Gilderoy Lockhart,  
  
Thank you for your last letter. I hope you are feeling better today. I don't know who you are able to be so brave and stay there. They ought to let you go, there isn't anything wrong with you. Honestly, you've fought bigger things than this. Well, stay strong for me.  
  
Much love, Katrina/i  
  
"What a dear. I wonder if she would like an autograph." I quickly signed a photo and stuffed it into an envelope along with a letter.  
  
After I spent a couple hours signing autographs and answering fan mail, I got up and looked at the clock. It was five minutes until 12. "Great Scott. I need to get to the Ball Room. People must be wondering where I am." I raced to the door and threw it open. There were so many people in the hall! Several of them were wearing white robes and were pushing little yellow carts with brooms sticking out of a back compartment.  
  
"Ah, hello! Are you coming to the signing?" I asked one of them.  
  
"Oh no sir. I'm afraid I have to finish cleaning up here."  
  
"Too bad, you're going to miss a great show. I'll make sure to send you a signed photo."  
  
"Ah gee, thanks." The wizard stared at me and smiled. "I need to get back to this, /i."  
  
"Well, right on then. Continue as you were. I must be going myself. "I walked away from the wizard in white and continued down the corridor to the ball room.  
  
The sun shown through the window, making the hall look like a thousand stars were shining their brightest, just for me. Of course, why shouldn't they? Who wouldn't want to do their best, for me that is?  
  
I walked boldly down the rest of the hall, and turned onto the main corridor to the Ball Room. There weren't as many people there as I thought there would have been. Maybe they are all inside! Yes! They are all inside waiting for me!  
  
I got to the French doors, and paused to look at myself in the glass.  
  
"What is this now? A split end?! How did I get a split end?! I don't get split ends! I'm Gilderoy Lockhart for God's sake! If I have a split end... where will it end? A hair out of place! A stained tooth?!" I said to Gilbert.  
  
I yanked the hair out and put it in my pouch with the rest of my hair. I can't throw it away. All of it is precious to me. Duh. I sighed and pulled the doors open while sticking a huge beaming grin on my beautiful face.  
  
There were people everywhere! Many sat at tables of two or four. They all looked up at me in surprise. Well no doubt! I was the best looking one there! Some of them were just horrid looking! But, they were my fans.  
  
I laughed. "Never fear, I am here at least. You can all greet me by staying in your seats. I don't need billions of people coming at me at once. But you all can, I dare say, form one line." No one moved. "But I'd rather you stay in your seats. Thank you."  
  
I walked up to the front to the room and saw several high ranking witches and wizards.  
  
"Oh hello. Are you here for an autograph? One of you is in my seat. I need to be in view of everyone," I said waving my hand at all my fans. They were averting their gaze's! Bless them. They were staring at their tables and funny little mates in front of them with either little round coins on white and black squares or little men dancing around on their tables, avoiding other little men. /i, I thought.  
  
The people at the front, to whom I was addressing, looked at one another. One of the wizards leaned over and whispered something in another wizard's ear. The wizard nodded.  
  
"Gilderoy, I'm sorry. Your," he paused, "signing has been...postponed."  
  
"Oh? Good heavens why?"  
  
"Your new...signing quill hasn't arrived. Yes, that's it, your new signing quill hasn't arrived. So sorry. When it arrives, we'll let you know immediately! Until then, I'm afraid this signing will have to wait. Of course, it is up to you. But this quill... goodness it's great."  
  
"A new quill? You got me a new quill? Thank you! Oh gosh, this is so neat! Thank you! But what am I to do now?"  
  
"Well, go back to your room or you can stay here and play some games."  
  
I thought for a moment. Games? Room? Games...? Room...? Room. "I'm going to go back to my room for a little bit and then I might come back here."  
  
"That's a good idea. Why don't you go take a nap or something. You look tired."  
  
"Tired?!" I raced out of the room. How could I, Gilderoy Lockhart, look anything but beautiful?! I ran all the way back to my room and slammed my door shut.  
  
"I must look hideous! Oh dear!" I summed up all the courage I had and walked to my mirror. I closed my eyes as I got to the mirror. "Ok Gilbert, you ready?" I snapped my eyes open and looked.  
  
"IT'S TRUE! WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO ME HERE?!" I shouted. I felt the room start to spin. It spun faster and faster until all of a sudden, I lost consciousness.  
  
I opened my eyes and all I could see was darkness.  
  
"I'VE GONE BLIND! AH!" I stumbled to my feet and rubbed my eyes furiously, but to no avail, I could not see anything.  
  
"Oh Gilbert! What is to come of me?" I felt my way over to my bed and flopped down on it. I could feel tears well up in my eyes. "I can never see the blueness of my eyes, or my fair skin after a rain has fallen upon it. Nor can I ever see my wonderful cheek bones!" I started weeping.  
  
I heard movement outside my door and then a knock at my door.  
  
"Who... who is it?" I called out into the dark of my new life.  
  
"It's only me, Drayce . I've come with dinner."  
  
"Come in. But I should warn you. I've gone blind, I can never see you're pretty face again."  
  
I heard the door open and Drayce come in.  
  
"You've gone... blind?" she said, trying to stifle her giggling.  
  
"Yes," I said woefully.  
  
"I see then."  
  
"I don't! I can't see."  
  
"Well nor can I" she said coming over to the bed and sitting down beside me.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I can't see in the dark either. What are you sitting in the dark with no lights on for?"  
  
"The light has gone out in my brain. I cannot see. The hideousness of my face blinded me."  
  
"Oh no it didn't. There are no lights on in here. /i," she chanted.  
  
Suddenly the lights came on.  
  
"I'm not blind anymore!"  
  
"You were never blind to begin with," she said, getting up from the bed.  
  
"Yes I was. When I went to the mirror and me and Gilbert saw my face, I lost my vision, and it knocked me out."  
  
"Ok, fine. Whatever. I'm putting your dinner on the desk. It's your favourite, pheasant, potatoes and leek, bread, and a salad. And then for dessert, you can come to the Dinning Hall and have come Crumble Cake. It's you favourite type, coffee."  
  
"Ok. I would be glad to join you."  
  
"Join me? Ok. It's being served early tonight for the meteor shower is tonight, and everyone is invited to go see it. Dessert is at 7, so hurry up."  
  
"Yes ok. See you in twenty minutes." She departed from my room and I sat down at my desk and began to eat.  
  
Fifteen minutes later, I finished dipping my bread in the gravy and swallowed it down. I sighed contently and got up. The remnants of the food and dishes vanished from my room as I walked over to the door.  
  
As I got to the Dinning Hall, I saw Drayce over by Mrs. McDougall. That poor woman... She wasn't in her right mind. Hallucinating things left and right. I walked over to them and sat at a near by table.  
  
"Ah, Gilderoy, you're here. Good." Drayce said. She walked over to me and sat down. "What a long day it has been."  
  
I watched as she brushed her long black hair into a pony tail. Her bright blue eyes lit up as she saw the cakes magically appear in front of them.  
  
"Bon appetite," she said picking up a fork and taking a bit.  
  
"Yes," I said, mimicking her actions and beginning to eat. i I never noticed how pretty she is/i, I thought. iHuh. Now maybe I have something else keeping me going here. /i  
  
"It's good. Isn't it?" I asked.  
  
"Oh yes. Yes it is." Under the candle light, her pale skin looked beautiful. "What?"  
  
"Oh nothing. Just...looking."  
  
"Huh uh, I see. And why were you looking at me like that?"  
  
"I just noticed how pretty you look." She blushed.  
  
"Oh. Well thank you Gilderoy."  
  
"You're welcome, but you hardly need to be told how pretty you are." She blushed farther.  
  
"We should get outside and watch the meteors."  
  
"Yes, ok," I said smiling at her.  
  
We walked toward the door. "After you," I told her.  
  
"Thanks." I nodded.  
  
I started to walk through the door, but ran into the doorframe on my way out. 


End file.
